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Divorcing with children can make things quite complex, particularly when your holiday arrangements clash with the terms of your child custody arrangement.
If your former partner asked to take your kid on vacation at a time when you were scheduled to have custody, would you let them go, or would you adhere to the terms of the custody arrangement?
In today’s story
Firstly, one woman is unwilling to concede to her former partner’s requests for altering the child custody arrangement.
Let’s read the entire tale.
Am I wrong here – my former spouse wants to take a trip before my scheduled travel time, which would reduce my custody period?
My former partner contacted me about taking our daughter on a trip, not sure where we should go or when exactly, but they’re thinking possibly Florida between June 20th and 26th.
Due to his regular custody arrangement, he will begin having her with him starting from June 18.
My personal vacation is scheduled to begin on June 18, followed by a business trip that starts on June 28.
Due to him asking me to surrender the 24th and 25th so she can go on the trip, and since my own business travel means giving up another 3.5 days, I’ll end up seeing her for just 1-2 days within a period of 2.5 weeks.
Her ex’s plan can’t realistically succeed.
Furthermore, the parenting agreement specifies that vacation requests must not surpass 7 days, inclusive of any regular parenting time. This means he would be out of compliance with (6/18-6/26).
I am unable to bring her the days prior to his trip since I have previously arranged to be out of town during those specific dates (6/18-6/21) and cannot alter them.
Furthermore, his original request did not mention this, so he hadn’t bothered to review the agreement to ensure his request met all the requirements at the time of asking.
They’re in a deadlock.
I expressed to him that I aspire to be more adaptable, yet I find myself unable to do so, and at the same time, I am not keen on going for extended periods without seeing my daughter.
He asserts that his plans are “set in stone” and cannot be changed.
This essentially means that his girlfriend set the dates with her ex-husband (who she doesn’t appear to get along with well) without informing him about it beforehand; only later did he learn these plans had been settled.
She brought her attorney into the matter.
I forwarded the email chain to my attorney since we’re scheduled for mediation next month. My ex-partner insists on adjusting his custody arrangement to align with his girlfriend’s schedule, but I’m uneasy about that. Additionally, our daughter has been sleeping on an air mattress at his place for several months now, and despite my concerns, nothing will be done until after their relocation planned for late summer.
However, that’s a separate matter from this one….
I informed him that I wouldn’t provide the scheduled days because he was violating our agreement and I’m worried about not getting sufficient time with my daughter during this period.
Am I being a jerk about this?
Attorneys likely enjoy scenarios such as these; they earn money from parents arguing over holiday schedules.
I don’t think she’s wrong, but I also think it wouldn’t be that big of a deal for her to let her ex take her daughter on vacation since it sounds like she has plans of her own for part of that time anyway.
Let’s take a look at how Reddit responded to this story.
In this scenario, a “kid” has something to contribute.
It appears to be an inconsistency in standards.
The issue might not lie with the vacation itself.
It will be beneficial for her daughter to have a holiday.
He should not be blamed for her past relationship.
She isn’t viewing this circumstance objectively.
If you liked that tale, check out this one instead.
A mother who had to bring along her three children when she went to apply for government assistance, only to end up being offered the dream job she never expected.
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His Former Spouse Intends to Take Their Daughter on Vacation, but She Contends That Their Child Custody Agreement Prohibits Him from Proceeding with His Plan.
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